What is the meaning? It's you.

Once again, my social life has taken a plunge and I find myself more content to start at a computer screen and listen to music that I do finding myself with people; friends. I get so easily annoyed and irritated by people; I think it's because of the looming prospect of winter coming.

I find myself increasingly scared of people and harder to talk to, more easy to be irate, and I don't know why any of this is really happening.

I wander around my apartment by day, stuck in headphones, wandering through my mind wondering what is my meaning here; why am I still here?

I feel like a waste of money, a waste of space. I have thrown off friends because I can't seem to throw these antics or this mindset that I don't really feel like I have ever really belonged here, not so much here as in where I am, but here on planet earth. Some people call this mindset disturbed some people call it scary, but I just feel like I am the product of a cosmic screw up.

Crooked Fights

Why do we fight?

Why do we run?

It would appear as though my past is struggling to make its way to my future and I am not letting it. I do suppose this is a good thing.

Down Here.

Down here under the microscope, it's hard to cope.

You hide your face in your hands, see if your eyes play tricks.

It's out of my control.



If you don't love me well don't shove me out into the dark,

without a flashlight or a spark.


Good Musics:

To Utah.

I'm going to Utah this weekend to check out some schools and what not. Should be a blast, the best is that I'm going with the girlfriend and I am staying with one of my best friends from Minnesota, which is a big deal and a big event for me because I haven't really seen him since April. Should be a blast, hopefully I get to see Petra and some other friends I have down there as well.

The only bad part about this whole thing is that I am going to be missing out on some good weekend video game play.

Oh well.

<3

Anew. Start.

And so it is; I am starting a whole new blog focusing more on the positive parts of life. I will start trying to update this one at least once a day with some sort of story or thought, or anything listed in the description. I am full of good ideas and new things, yet I maintain a pretty basic routine throughout the day, and I will focus on all these in here. I miss everyone, I have also made this one RSS (Google Reader anyone?) subscribe-able, so by all means, use it :)